Ari Ballaban — In Conversation

Go Ahead and Disagree with Me – I’m Listening!
Most people naturally gravitate toward two types of conversation, reflected by such televised debates.
On the one hand, folks discuss topics aligning with and validating their preexisting standpoints. To varying degrees, we all operate in bubbles and echo chambers.
On the other hand, when we talk to people who don’t share our views, many of us eschew deep and respectful conversations in lieu of “gotchas” or shouting matches. Instead of trying to understand our “opponents,” we seek ways to portray them as ridiculous or immoral.
That’s why talking heads’ rage-bait is so popular. It gives us what we want. It “saves” us from doing the hard work of bridge building, which can be exhausting, unsatisfying, and even dangerous to our in-group social standing. But from a community organizing standpoint, this easy out is insufficient.
Speaking with someone who disagrees with you on something like abortion rights, the Israel-Palestine dilemma, or the root causes of extremism will not always lead to anyone’s mind being changed, but often the conversations themselves are the point. Healthy societies aren’t built on dichotomies of us-versus-them or heroes-against-villains; instead, they emerge when real people have respectful, tough conversations about things they truly value. And we build that healthy society by listening more to those with whom we disagree and looking down on them less. We may never see eye to eye, but we need to at least be able to look one another in the face.
Dear Rabbi Ballaban,
First, I have no argument with any of your stands. Instead I am inviting you to come to ACTVE MINDS, a group of multi faith, intelligent seniors who meet each Tuesday at the J. We range in age from 70 to 98 and believe me many in this group have razor sharp intelligence and keep up with many diverse topics. Yes, we are mostly on the same page as you,
However, a couple of different points of view surface weekly.
Will also note, you do not qualify because of “your youth and inexperience” JOKING! Just think you may find us interesting.
Sincerely,
Bernice Pollack
Moderator—Active Minds